Trust the Journey

As many of you know by now, I spent the last two years traveling full time around Spain and Portugal in my van, while trying to figure out a new career path while also trying to find a new future home base.

I remember very distinctly back in 2021 the feeling of needing a change. There was this craving of experiencing something completely different. The first nine months of traveling were filled with fun and new friends and lots and lots of adventures.

After a while on the road, I was starting to search for a sense of home. My heard started plotting and planning and dreaming. A new home maybe? Is that my new goal? Is that why I left?

Now after two years, Portugal has become another home. It’s not a foreign country anymore. I have my papers there, started the process of buying land and found friends that have become family. It’s really quite magical how a place you have never visited before can become such a special place.

Life is exciting and new and also fucking overwhelming. For me it felt like I was at the start again and again. If I’m honest, most of the time I felt very overwhelmed with the goals I set for myself, trying to chase something…work towards something…build up something. My life has been extremely intense. No routine. No security. But an infinite amount of freedom and possibilities. And I want to do them all. I don’t know what boredom is anymore. How people spend hours and hours in front of a TV or phone. And while I am utterly convinced that the only way to grow is by willing to plunge into the endeavors that are beyond our current abilities, I have too often tried to control a situation that was simply out of my control.

I am on a journey. Most literally. Externally and internally.

I have to remind myself every day to take it slow. And what a privilege it is to choose a slower paced life. Taking the time to really absorb the world around you and be present in the moments that in my old life would have left me unfulfilled and bored.

What I’m learning over and over again is to trust the journey and how important it is to let go of things that are not meant to be yours. I have found that whatever the situation I might find myself in, the best way is always to approach it with an open mind and an open heart.

For me trusting the journey means embracing change, being able to adapt. Letting go and beginning anew. Being emotional and vulnerable and falling apart at times and then figuring out how to put yourself back together. What a whirlwind. But such a rewarding one.

Anyway my coping mechanism for overwhelm is always to go into nature and paint. Painting because I want to, not because I have something to prove or a goal to reach. Forgetting the time, not being governed by money or clocks or any of the artificial restrains that humanity imposes on itself. And my latest paintings have been the result of that. Creativity is about breaking boundaries every day and trusting the process to find the nuggets of gold, without knowing how it will land. Just like my life. I do and commit to things ways before I have any track record of success.

I am so happy I found art as a new career path, because it forces you to solve problems in a different way and understanding how you feel in the face of other voices without second-guessing yourself.